Today we salute you, Mr. Douchebag! Occupier of unused equipment, disregarder of the disinfectant wipe, and most importantly…CROP DUSTER.
This is all about one guy. Last week during my shoulder workout the gym was somewhat full because it was lunch time and most soldiers try to squeeze in a workout during their break. So I’m sitting on a bench, doing my dumbbell shoulder press and this guy walks up near me and starts to do his thing. Completely typical, no problem. He does a couple of sets and walks off, meanwhile, I have a couple of 70 pound dumbbells raised over my head, when SUDDENLY I begin to choke on some of the meanest gas I have ever experienced! This MF just crop dusted the ENTIRE DUMBBELL RACK! If you know anything about lifting, you know that breathing is pretty important. I need oxygen to keep my muscles from giving me out and falling on my head. How can someone be such a doucher?! If you have to relieve yourself AT LEAST walk out into the hall or something. This guy just let it rip 18″ from my face and walked off. AWESOME.
So later during my workout I see the guy using a bench for some dumbbell flat bench. He finishes, gets up, doesn’t re-rack, and goes to the next machine without wiping it down. Normally this really isn’t that big of a deal to me but this guy was sweating like Shaq at the foul line. He had underboob sweat marks and everything. Come on man, you didnt bring a towel, nor are you going to even attempt to wipe up your skin’s excremement?!
I went and did some other stuff and came back to the dumbbell area for my last exercise and there he is again, thank god he’s not using the bench i need right? Right! well, sort of. He is not using a bench but he IS occupying one with only his little book and shaker cup. Even after me staring at him in the mirror (which is an obvious suggestion to move your $#!t) he continues to lift, glances at me and just goes about his merry little lift.
Fortunately that is the last time I saw him that day. One more incident and someone (him) could have been seriously hurt.
For the love of God, Allah, or whoever you believe in, AVOID BEING THIS PERSON.
